Almost a Buddha

The End of Perfection, the Beginning of Peace
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There was a time in my life when I tried to become a Buddha.
Not metaphorically.
Literally.
I tried to look like a Buddha.
To walk like a Buddha.
To speak like Christ.
To live like the great saints.
To purify, to transcend, to become the “perfect” human being.
But something always felt off.
Like I was wearing someone else’s robe.
Like I was imitating holiness instead of embodying truth.
And now I see why.

The Trap of Becoming 'Like' a BuddhaTrying to become a Buddha is the greatest obstacle to actually being one.
Because in that trying, there is effort.
In that effort, there is tension.
And in that tension, there is the subtle message:
"I am not enough as I am."
This is not enlightenment.
This is spiritual performance.
This is spiritual perfectionism dressed as devotion.
You meditate, not to listen—but to fix.
You pray, not to open—but to control.
You smile, not from joy—but from expectation.
You become a good boy, a good girl--
But inside, the storm remains.

Buddhahood Is Not PerfectionThe real Buddha was not an untouchable icon.
He was a man who understood.
He saw through illusion—not by fighting it, but by observing it.
He did not destroy the self.
He saw that the self was already empty of inherent form.
He did not suppress desire.
He transcended the need to be ruled by it.
Buddhahood is not about having no darkness.
It is about not being disturbed by it.

The Modern MisunderstandingIn today’s world, we’re taught to seek:

• A perfect life.
• A perfect mindset.
• A perfect image of “peace.”

But this is the real illusion:
That peace comes from eliminating pain, chaos, or negativity.
It does not.
Peace is not the absence of noise.
It is the presence of stillness within the noise.
It is the ability to stay centered while the waves crash.
To let go while the world clings.
To be present with every part of your humanity--
Even the shadows.

The Realization: From Pretending to PeaceI don’t need to become a Buddha.
I need to stop pretending not to be.
And what that means is this:

• I stop performing perfection.
• I stop resisting the parts of me that feel broken.
• I stop thinking “awakening” means being above others.
• I stop trying to erase my feelings to prove I’m evolved.

Instead--

• I let my thoughts pass like clouds.
• I observe my moods like tides.
• I love the child within me who still wants to be seen.
• I relax into being human.

And the most beautiful thing happens:
Inner peace begins to arise—not because I earned it, but because I stopped resisting it.

Inner Peace Is the Real EnlightenmentNot bliss.
Not ecstasy.
Not perfection.
Just peace.
The Buddha—the real Buddha—is not someone who never feels pain.
He is the one who does not wage war against it.
He does not fight his thoughts.
He does not fear his shadows.
He does not clench around life.
He breathes.
He sees.
He understands.
And because of that, he rests—within himself, within life, within the moment.

You Are Already CloseYou don’t need to “be like” anyone.
You don’t need to ascend to some unreachable ideal.
You only need to see clearly.
You are almost a Buddha.
And the “almost” is not a failure.
It is a gift.
Because it reminds you that there’s nothing more to chase.
There’s only more to realize.
You don’t need a perfect mind.
You need a peaceful heart.
You don’t need the world to bow to you.
You just need to stop bowing to your fears.
And then—you are not almost a Buddha.
You are.
A realized being.
A peaceful presence.
A mirror of truth for a world that is starving for authenticity.